W: Welcome to our program, Friends and Relationships. Our guest today is psychologist Steve Pinker from McGill University.
M: Glad to be here, Jane.
W: Hi, Steve. Our question today is why friends suddenly disappear. They may block us on their social media accounts and stop responding to our emails. They simply vanish without a trace.
M: The answer may lie in childhood, the way the person related to their mom and dad. It’s related to their attachment styles.
W: Attachment styles?
M: Yeah. There are two different attachment styles: an anxious attachment style and an avoidant attachment style.  When there is a relationship breakdown with their parents, children with an anxious attachment style scream and cry to get their parents to come back. But other children simply shut down and try to deal with their emotions by ignoring the situation. And these attachment styles carry on into adulthood.
W: Does avoidance reduce their stress levels?
M: Not really. Their stress levels are actually the same as those experienced by the children who yell and scream.
W: And I assume both might be termed insecure.
M: Exactly. And it’s a very insecure attachment.
W: How does an insecure attachment affect relationships between friends, co-workers and romantic relationships?
M: It’s the same as conflicts. So if you have a disagreement with a securely attached person, they’re not going to panic. They’re able to hear what the other person is saying and express their own feelings and thoughts effectively. However, an insecurely attached person won’t. They might either attack you, get defensive, or just disappear from your life. To them, a difference, no matter how small in your eyes, signals the end of the relationship.
W: That explains why they suddenly disappear.

Q8: What do we learn about the man?
Q9: What are the speakers mainly talking about?
Q10: How do children with an anxious attachment style react to a breakdown in their relationship with parents?
Q11: What does the man say about insecurely attached people?